Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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