I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
