She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize