I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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