Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
