i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
