You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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