We're facebook friends in real life
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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