so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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