Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
