She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
We talked him into tasing himself.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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