i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
