Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize