remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Randomize
