How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I have fence marks all over my body
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
