2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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