the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
