I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize