We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
