We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
