You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
