I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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