Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize