I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
