Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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