I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
