I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
This gyro tastes like lonliness
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize
