Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Randomize
