whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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