no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize