Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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