You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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