uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Randomize
