yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
