if you like me you must not know who I am
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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