I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize