I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Pappa wants mamma naked
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
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