Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
