I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
