For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize
