i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Randomize
