can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize