Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
