If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize