Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
soo... how was my night?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
