im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I wish you could order shots online.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
