he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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