i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
