Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
