um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I don't think brook has ever known best
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
