my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
