Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
