his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
