i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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